I’ve heard a few rumblings about a pumpkin shortage lately, but it seemed that it was mostly a canned pumpkin shortage which didn’t concern me as I’ve had the same 4 cans of pumpkin in my cupboard for the last six years. I like to make pumpkin pie out of fresh pumpkin because taking 2 or 3 hours to do something instead of 30 minutes is a skill of mine and also I can feed all the stringy goop inside to the Pinkertons, after which they worship me like a god. The alleged scarcity didn’t merit much thought until one day I looked outside and saw a pumpkin shortage in MY OWN YARD!!!

That’s right, a thieving nogoodnik has taken my pumpkin. And this was no ordinary pumpkin, but a perfectly round, perfectly orange, exceptionally beautiful pumpkin. It was exactly the size of a regulation basketball and whoever took it has just helped themselves to a giant heaping spoonful of “You’ll Get Yours,” not from me of course because I don’t know who they are and probably wouldn’t do anything about it even if I did, but the universe has a way of righting itself over petty bullshit, like the time I stepped in dog poop right after silently mocking a guy riding a tall bike. Anyway, it’s a crying shame about my pumpkin. If only I had grown one that you needed a wheelbarrow to move.

This one is on the way to my piano lesson. Evidently the neighborhood pumpkin thieves don’t want the trouble of breaching that chain link fence and herniating themselves carrying it away.

Look I found my blog! It was behind the couch the whole time with my doghair collection and a crusty fork. Soooooo….where did I leave off? Yes, I went to the Soapbox Derby. Then school started and all of a sudden AngstyNoMore went off to college. Many events led up to this day so it shouldn’t have come as such a shocker, yet I found myself supremely startled and nonplussed after dropping her off at her new digs. I know logically that Reed College is a mere 5 minutes away by autobus, however the distance between a kid at home and one at Hogwarts a prestigious university where they have dorms with fire places, all night dance parties and a couch swing, is infinite. Luckily the remaining future mover-outers (sob) have pooled their resources to keep my mind off AngstyNoMore’s absence, Snowpea by falling 62 equations behind in Algebra and becoming estranged from the truth, K by signing up for EVERY SINGLE SCHOOL BASED AFTER SCHOOL ACTIVITY AVAILABLE with the nutty notion that I can be in several places at once and live to fetch and carry, and Dashman by just being so goshdarned sweet that I keep being talked into ice cream dinners and Runescape marathons.

All this and I still found time to mop a garage rooftop at a job with gallons of a stinky black petroleum product which ended up all over my hands and shoes. I was ripe for a feathering by the end of the day. Naturally I was able to clean myself up in a safe and environmentally friendly way with a refreshing dip in the turpentine fountain. My skin has never felt more flammable. So that’s what I’ve been up to.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch I’ve got a tiny winter garden started in pots.

Arugula, purple mustard, kale, spinach, and volunteer nasturtiums are nestled in old ugly plastic tubs. It feels hopeful to have new growth just when the regular garden is dying back, and not the half-baked hopefulness of new flowers on the tomatoes but little shoots of green that prefer the coolness of October. I love kale but usually lose the aphid battle around July when it heats up so I’m super excited to see my winter red and Nero Di Toscana Kales up and at ‘em. The spinach is Tyee Spinach which is billed as a 4 season plant but I’ve never grown it this late before. The arugula and mustard greens are from saved seed and I know they’ll do well, just like I know Angsty will flourish out there in the land of predictably quirky semi-controlled hedonism which I’m told is actually a solid liberal arts education. October is here, another beginning, another end.